Dear brother, dear relatives!
Since I cannot write to each of you individually,
I use the chance to write a little more in detail in
order to write a common message to all of you.
First of all, I thank everyone who wrote to me
for the New Year and my name day; thanks in particular
to all the soldiers who have written to me,
although not all letters and cards have arrived.
Next, I would like to write to you all about what
is happening right now in my heart. This is a farewell
letter, maybe only for a few months, maybe for
years, and maybe forever.
You have certainly heard and read from the
newspaper that there will be another resettlement to
Germany from all the Baltic States, Lithuania, Latvia
and Estonia. I, as a German, have been strongly
advised to join the resettlement.
There were a variety of reasons that made me
think about it. I cannot describe them in detail; anyway,
I almost went so far as to register with the
Commission for Resettlement. But then a number of
circumstances coincided so curiously in my life that I
knew this: it is God’s will that I stay here. The final
push was the telegram from Rome, from which I saw
that this decision also fulfilled the wishes of the Holy
Father.
However, if I make this decision, it will have
many consequences; the first is that, after the departure
of the Germans and the closure of the German
Embassy expected by the beginning of March, I have
to stop all correspondence with Germany. If I wanted
to stay in correspondence with German citizens, this
could be considered very suspicious. I might be considered
a German spy and also treated accordingly.
That is why my letter today must remain the last
one. Until the situation changes, I cannot write anymore.
It could have unpleasant consequences for me.
The second consequence is that I have to give up
all the protection that I, as a German, have so far
received from the German Embassy and the German
State, and to become a Soviet citizen and to abide by
the Soviet State. Since you know that the Soviet State
is basically hostile to religion and, in particular, the
Catholic Church is ill-treated, you may realize that
this decision can have far-reaching consequences.
To date, the situation in the Church is like this:
all houses belonging to the Church, with one exception,
have been nationalized. We have lost 8 houses
and 2 chapels. Three churches have been nationalized
already and others will soon follow. It is not
yet clear whether it is necessary to start paying rent
or not for the use of churches. If the rent has to be
paid, it is likely to be very high, as high as for my
room. For the room that I have now, I had to pay
160 rubles last month, while a neighboring room
that is only two square meters smaller only costs 11
rubles. A clergyman is currently charged the highest
rental rate.
If churches are also required to pay such a high
rent, we should pay 2,500 rubles for our church,
which we certainly cannot afford to pay. In this case,
we should try to rent a common church with the
Lutheran and Orthodox, or worship in several places
in private homes, which, of course, would also be
difficult.
Otherwise, we have enough to live on to start
with, and people are donating so much that we
probably do not have to go hungry. Well, then there
is the war that needs to be taken into account in
the future, for which we still do not know when it
will come and how everything will then evolve.
But otherwise, everything indispensable for living is
there, so I have no worries about it.
The only danger that might threaten me is that
the priests will be expelled or arrested here. So far, this
has not happened. There is hardly any direct danger
of death, maybe of illness due to major hardships:
you know that my health is not the best and my body
is not very resilient. However, I am not afraid that I
shall be treated very harshly, maybe some respect for
the Catholic bishop is given, in order not to be in a
bad light in the eyes of the world. A direct danger of
death can occur if the war unfolds.
However, despite the fact that the future from a
human point of view is not so pleasant, I made the
decision to stay here. It is also fairer that a shepherd
stays with his flock and shares its happiness and sorrows.
And I have to say that even if this decision
required a few weeks’ preparation from me, I did not
do it with any fear or anxiety but with great joy. And
when it finally became clear that I had to stay, my
happiness was so great that I prayed the “Te Deum”
out of gratitude and joy. Overall, I felt the impact of
the grace of God in my soul so strongly that I have
hardly ever felt so happy in my life as I was on the
Thursday night after the decision, and I have never
celebrated the Holy Mass with such devotion as on
last Friday, the day after the decision. I would have
liked to tell everyone how good God is to us, when
we give ourselves fully to Him; how happy we can be
when we are ready to give Christ everything – including
freedom and life.
Therefore, I have never been so grateful to God
for the grace of priesthood as in the last days. And
this is not only because God has been so good to me,
but also because I found so much love and gratitude
with people, too, when they heard that I am staying
here. Of course, in recent years, a lot has apparently
been severely damaged of what I had been trying
to build over the last ten years with such care and
effort. But a lot has remained of what I have been
allowed to do for souls. And especially some of the
recent converts admitted by me into the Church express
their truly touching love and gratitude. So, in
spite of all this, I cannot thank God enough for all
that He has allowed me to do here. Regarding the
future, of course, I do not know what will transpire.
Nobody knows exactly how things will go. But one
thing I know today firmly: God’s will is that I stay
here now – and I am glad about this and will meet
the future with great hope. And thus, everything is
all right! And my life and – if this is how it has to
be – my death will be life and death for Christ.
However, I would like to thank you all once
again for all your love, as well as for the material
sacrifices made for our mission. May God indemnify
all of you and bless you in many ways! I also
want to express my gratitude in front of the altar,
and I myself, too, ask from my heart for your help
through prayers. If you want to do something for me,
let a Holy Mass be occasionally celebrated for me.
Maybe the pastor of Leimersdorf, to whose congregation
my home place belongs, could ask the people
of my hometown to pray that God would not deny
His grace to me also in the future, so that I could be
in everything – whatever it may be – faithful to my
high and holy calling and mission, and give Christ
and His Kingdom all my power and, if this is His
holy will, my life. That would be the most beautiful
end to my life.
May God keep us all in our holy ministry and
holy faith, and bless us all. From here, I send you
my Episcopal blessing, as if I were in your midst for
the last time: may the blessing of Almighty God, the
Father + and the Son + and the Holy Spirit + come
upon you and remain with you forever.
Amen.
With a heartfelt farewell greeting,
Your Eduard